Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Cut to it

A friend recently asked me if she should start a family and when she does, what can she expect--what will it BE LIKE. I gave her my honest response in between stuffing my face with chips and dips in an rare moment without any having to swat tiny hands away from my gaping mouth. Perhaps it was the guacamole talking, but I was positive and reassuring. I'm a big advocate of baby-making (that one's for you, Toph!), but I'm not big on sharing my deepest, innermost tender thoughts on my family and personal journey of motherhood in a loud party among mostly strangers while listening to my husband read palms. I should note here that he read palms for over two hours. That should be a significant part of the story. I'm not sure why, but it should be. Maybe to reiterate that I had some time on my hands seeing as the line to play Guitar Hero was too long. I mean, I want to be a rock star too, but not if I have to stand in line my friend.

So my grandma send me Ginzu knives this week. The real ones ya seen on the tv. She ordered them years ago and never opened them, so great for me. My grandma's clearing stuff out. She'll be 90 next month and she's been getting things in order for her death for years. She doesn't want us to have to go in and clean out a bunch of junk. It's the Valentine way. Why would you leave a mess? WHY?!? But back to the knives: they CUT! I cut my finger because I didn't know that with good knives (read: real), you can't cut fruit in your hand. And also, they make cuts in the linoleum countertops. Who knew? I guess that I was really more of bending my food than actually cutting it. I've seen a whole new world and it is magical.

There's no way I can explain what it is like to be a mother. It is so many things at the same time and most of them are inexplicable. At least for me. I'm sure there's some Family Circle cartoon or Chicken Soup for the MOTHER'S Soul that's really hit it on the head. Does it have anything to do with knives? Could there be a metaphor in my special knife experience? I think so, but I'm too busy BEING AWESOME IN 2006 to draw any conclusions for you. I'm sure you moms will understand.